I talked before about how spending most of my 20s single was awesome, and how it really made me appreciate the state of being single. Fast forward to my 30s, and I’ve spent most of those years in a relationship. And the state of being taken, being with someone, has some awesome pros too!
So, if you had your singlehood and have moved on from it to “current status: in a relationship,” you don’t have to mourn your single days like there is nothing to look forward to. Let’s talk about the pros of being in a relationship!
1. Lots of lovin’
First and foremost…as a woman with the love language of physical touch, one of my top pros about being in a relationship is all the lovin’ I can get whenever I want (well, you know what I mean). From the hand holding, to the lower back rubbing, to the stolen kisses, to the body rubs, to the rolling around romps, there is no shortage of those physical affection actions being in a relationship. When you’re single you might find yourself going a little longer than you prefer without them…but having a boo means it’s there for you! As long as you and your partner talk and have an understanding about what your physical needs are of course!
2. You can balance the yin and yang
When you have a significant other, one pro is that you have the opportunity to balance the yin and the yang. For example, when I have a rough day or am drained of energy, my partner is there to pick up the positive energy, take care of extra things for me, etc. My yin is at one level, and he acts as the yang to create balance between us. I love and am so thankful for this part of being in a relationship. No two days are the same and things/needs are constantly changing. It’s wonderful knowing you have someone that will help round things out, and it’s a privilege to be able to be that for your partner as well. They are the yin to your yang, and reverse! Thank goodness for romantic partners in this way.
3. You get to know someone on a deeper level
A pro to being single is meeting a lot of people, dating, and having fun with it all. In a relationship, one of the pros is being able to go beyond the surface level to truly get to know someone. The deep stuff. The sometimes hard and scary stuff. But that is where the real richness lies in connecting with someone and building trust! And just as you have the opportunity to learn about your significant other, they have the same with you. And for you, it’s an opportunity to open up and be vulnerable in ways you wouldn’t if you were casually dating someone. Brené Brown says, “vulnerability is basically uncertainty, risk, and emotional exposure.” And she also says, “vulnerability is the birthplace of love, belonging, joy, courage, empathy, and creativity. It is the source of hope, empathy, accountability, and authenticity.” Being in a relationship creates an opportunity for us to be and have this vulnerability, which can create all the healthy feelings she mentioned that we all want and need.
4. You get to imagine a future with them
Remember how when we were kids, we used to dream about and imagine our future? What we wanted to be, what we wanted to have, how we wanted to act, etc. Growing up doesn’t mean we have to lose that imagination and that ability to dream. Being in a relationship creates an opportunity to do that dreaming with someone. Think about the future, together – what does it look like? What do you want? What do you see as a two-some? The dreaming with someone is so much fun! And what’s even cooler is after you start dreaming it, you start creating it together. My fiancé and I are at that place now, and it’s such a wonderfully fulfilling process! So, imagine. Dream. That’s a big pro of being coupled up!
5. Couples choice – you tell me!
Just like with being single – different people have different perspectives on the pros of being in a relationship! So, you tell me what you find to be your favorite pros of having a boo. Let’s rally around all the great things! Especially since sometimes, if you’ve been in a relationship for a while and your S.O. just happens to be annoying the heck out of you, you can lose sight of those pros. Let’s hear what you got!
Sometimes you may want to ride this life-game solo, but when you remember the great parts to having a co-pilot, you will be grateful for whoever that co-pilot is!
Hey everyone! I'm Darling D and so happy to be at your service here on the site. I'm a high energy lover of love, sex, and open conversations! I write posts on all relationship related topics and answer any questions you have in the Darling D advice column. I want you to have your best relationship and sex life possible!